Recruitment can be an emotional war zone. You emerge at your desk every day, frightfully unaware of the potential danger or euphoria that eagerly awaits your always impeccably punctual arrival. We thought we would bring some of these very real, sensitive situations to life, so that those who berate you and have little understanding of your legit struggles can gain some kind of grasp on the battlefield that is RECRUITMENT!
1.Your walk home after making placement.
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it Beyonce? We don't know but we do know that this b*tch be fierce. SASHA FIERCE.
2. The candidate ownership battle.
3. When a candidate pulls out at offer stage after a 3 month recruitment campaign and a picky client.
This is no more a bit of business than it is a highly publicised religious reformation.
4. The 'oh am I really top biller 12 months in a row? I wasn't aware (NAAAT)' face.
Every recruitment agency possesses one. The kind of face that makes you want to pull out your hair and eat it.
5. The Friday afternoon of month end.
You've been in recruitment no less than 6 months and you're already a borderline alcoholic with a penchant for peanuts.
6. Your candidate has accepted and signed their contract which you forced them to do so with ink drawn from their own blood.
You've bound them biologically to their new role and you're ecstatic!
6. Beating your biggest competitor to the punch.
The below is what some may call AGILE. Savage.
7. When the coffee delivery's a day late.
All you can do now is focus on fighting for what remains of your mortality for the next 9 hours. This isn't about a job anymore. This is about your LIFE.
8. Those days when you just can't be arsed.
We've all been there. If you're saying you haven't you're only lying to yourself. "Ah right, yeah, work, yeah. I'm just, erm, sourcing candidates today"
LOL JOKE I'm pissing myself laughing internally watching video links from Dean in IT of dogs dressed up as humans.
9. When you've got a frightfully unrealistic target and you know you're not going to hit it.
Instead of attempting to smash target you render yourself temporarily indisposed due to an unidentified, highly severe and extremely rare medical condition. You display the odd symptom for approximately 48 hours before deadline day #twitchy.
10. The morning after the night before.
Recruiters know how to work hard and play even harder. The morning after is when it hurts the most. You're still drunk and drooling, trying to eat a scotch egg with brown sauce straight from the packet, whilst walking around the office with one sock on, in fear of what might have potentially occurred just a few hours prior to your current situation. You then spend your entire lunch break fingering a burger in the Mudlark wondering how and if you're going to survive till 5. This is a low point in your life.
11. The post-Christmas lecture.
12. Payday feels avec a chunky commission bonus.
Here at OnlyMarketingJobs we love recruiters. Whilst we work with hundreds of recruitment agencies and direct employers at the moment, we would love to build relationships with new ones! We offer a number of high quality services for recruiters are looking to advertise jobs on our website, so please get in touch with us to see what we can do for you.
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